Resolutions and intentions may sound like the same thing, but they are actually quite different. Resolutions are defined as the solution, accommodation, or settling of a problem. Intentions are defined as an act or instance of determining mentally upon some action or result. When we take these definitions into consideration, one is focused on the past, fixing a problem, while the other is focused on the future and inviting something in.
Do you ever notice most New Year’s resolutions stem from a ‘should’?
- I should lose weight
- I should stop eating so much sugar
- I should exercise more
- I should eat better
- I should clean the house more often
- I should do this or do that, because if I do I’ll be worth more
Should’s are sneaky and they only do one thing, make us feel bad about ourselves.
On the other hand, having an intention (or desire) to be healthier or the intention of moving your body more, can look a little different.
- I desire to move my body more often
- I desire to eat a vegetable every day
- I desire to research ways people have successfully stopped eating sugar
- I desire to tidy my house every week, but hire a house cleaner for the big stuff.
When we read the two lists above, which list feels lighter? The second one, right? Thinking this way can help catapult us towards what we desire instead of making ourselves feel wrong. The words and ideas might be subtle, but it makes a huge difference to the body memory.
The other potential disaster about resolutions is in the timing. Everyone in the world wants to start something on January 1st and it makes total sense, it’s the start of a fresh new year. Unfortunately, this can also be a set up, if and when a situation arises and a different choice is made that doesn’t align with the resolution, all bets are off and we wind up feeling like a failure. Some people don’t harness that resolution again until the following January 1st.
Intentions or desire live in a different place in our psyche. They are open ended, there is room for play and room for shifting, things tend to unfold inside of intentions as opposed to coming to a halting stop.
Here’s a suggestion, find an unused, beautiful notebook to write out your intentions and desires for the next year. Whether it’s something that you would like to bring to fruition this month or in six months, it doesn’t matter, but they must be something that you desire within this next year. Write everything out and assign them a loose timeline. For example, by let’s say by March 1st, I desire to be attending yoga every week or I desire to meditate every day or I desire to have saved $500. Now, on the first of every month, or at least quarterly, sit down with your notebook and do an inventory, how is it going? If you didn’t reach your $500 goal, what did you reach? Was it $300? Does that feel more comfortable? If so, modify your desire to be in alignment with what is. Or maybe you’ve been going to yoga once a week and absolutely love it, do you have the bandwidth to bump that up to three times a week? If so, write it down and make these things your new intention for that next month.
This is a wonderful way to keep you on track and keep you in awareness of your deepest desires. There is no failure here, life simply unfolds and adjustments are natural. Progressing towards your intentions each month brings consistency and that is key.
At the end of the year, take a look back and relish in all that you’ve accomplished, have realizations around the things that were challenging and recognize which things weren’t so important after all. Take in the learning, receive the gifts, enjoy the journey and apply them to the next year. And so on and so on.
